Children of alcoholics. Part 4 – emotional life continued

In the first three articles on children of alcoholics we started showing how alcohol abuse by parents affect children’s life both physically and emotionally. There are important consequences of drinking most of the time ignored by people simply because of lack of information and proper education since early ages.

You can read these articles here:

1. Insidious damages inflicted on drinker’s family. Children of alcoholics. (part 1)
2. Insidious damages inflicted on drinker’s family. Children of alcoholics. (part 2)
3. Children of alcoholics. Part 3 – emotional life.

Today we continue with drinking consequences on children’s emotional life. The first article on emotional life showed how very young children and infants are suffering from family violence in general and how alcohol is most of the time the primary cause for such violence. A simple scene of both parents arguing is perceived by the child with much higher intensity than we can imagine and the memory of that feeling does not disappear while he grows, affecting his emotional stability.

In what follows, I will lay down an example (A clinical case) which [...Read the rest of this article at the new location of this blog. Click here...]

Insidious damages inflicted on drinker’s family. Children of alcoholics. (part 1)

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I participated to a group of Anonymous Alcoholics meeting one evening. The topic of the debate was about the troubles and the misfortunes alcohol generates to the Alcoholic himself.

That is, about the problems related to poverty, loss of job, improper qualification and limitation, the feeling of abandonment from the part of the partner or of his own children, the degradation of the person’s social relationship, and the release of his exploitation by the others; the loss of attraction, of stigmatization, fights and murders, driving and domestic accidents or of any other kin.

These have severe consequences such as: invalidity, death, loss of goods, the impossibility of succeeding in his own plans, projects or business affairs, the incapacity to manage his time with the loss of the deadlines, the incapacity to get and to use in his own benefit the outcomes and the success, the conflicts he has with the police, various civil and penal rights implications and many others.

I felt the need to intervene: yes, all these misfortunes frequently happen to the one who drinks a lot. But we are selfish if we complain only about what is happening to us.

Drinking consequences quickly overpass own persona and destroy beings and fates we would have never thought of. I am not talking here about the alcoholic’s partner, although the life spent with an alcoholic is so hard, and it could be understood only by the one who has lived such experience by himself. I neither talk here about the unhappy fate of that non alcoholic family whose parent was killed by a drunken driver on the zebra, after he had gone from the “Beer Festival” by car.

I am talking about children of alcoholics who suffer since before they are born if the mother drinks during pregnancy, who suffer when they are little and the parents fight, who develop most of the time heavy emotional and physical problems due to the fact that one or both of their parents are alcoholics. These children carry a burden all their lives directly inherited from parent’s deeds.

In the next articles we will start discussing the fate of the alcoholic’s children. We will try to list and discuss the damages the drunken persons inflict to their children without even knowing it. Before we start, what are your experiences on this topic ?

Read part two of “Insidious damages inflicted on drinker’s family. Children of alcoholics.” article here.

“Alcoholism begins in a group but it ends up in loneliness.”

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…it is a tragic truth we’ve seen too many times and so many times overlooked by parents when prepare their teenage children for the first party to attend.

The joyful days of youth when we started going to parties. Places and people we enjoyed and love to remember. If only at that moment someone would’ve told us that drinking and laughing together could be the start of loneliness…

We’ve all seen too many times youngsters drinking alcohol to get the courage to approach a girl or just to warm up and bring more life to the party. Can you count how many of them have become alcohol addicts ? I guess you all know some. And once they did, have the majority of people around them continued to treat them like nothing happened and stayed around them?
The loneliness part comes once the drinker starts making excesses and misbehave. The others will gradually start pushing him away, avoid inviting him to group gatherings, and eventually he or she will be completely rejected. The sad thing is that he or she will not realize that alcohol is to blame and will instead blame the others for the isolation and his problems.

Take other stories, like a drinker who once had a family, a job and work colleagues which are now all gone. Why? Because nobody told him before he started drinking that alcohol will take away all the persons around him and leave him alone.

Is alcohol a shameful guilty vice ? Can an alcoholic be held responsible for having become an alcoholic ? Is there hope ? …these are questions to be answered further in our discussion. Meantime, feel free to comment, add your own experience, examples or simply contradict what it is said above. We want to hear from you.

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The new address for this article is: http://alcohol.gethelpfor.com/general/%e2%80%9calcoholism-begins-in-a-group-but-it-ends-up-in-loneliness%e2%80%9d/2008/01/11/